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Shitty Wedding Advice You Can Ignore

Bad wedding advice

If you're engaged and currently in the mist of planning your wedding, you have probably received ALOT of unsolicited advice.


Yes I’m sure its because they are just trying to help, but then you get that one person who just keeps coming at you with the ultimate worst help they could give you, and you think maybe they are just a screwed up, horrible person? And more often than not, it always comes from a Jan. Don’t ask me why, its just how life is.

Below is some of the crappiest, just plain stupid wedding advice going around. Try to keep the eye-rolling to a minimum please.

“Just take out a loan”

Umm no, sorry. I’m not going to put myself into debt just so I can have a $5000 dress. You can easily have a wedding well within your budget without having to take a loan out. Consider cutting down on the guest list, cost of your dress, favours or even flowers. Or opt to have a longer engagement so you can save up for your ultimate wedding.



“Just send them an invite, they won’t come”

No, no, no. Because they will come. And if you “just send an invite” to 20 extra people, and they do show up, that’s 20 extra mouths you have to feed, supply drinks and accommodate seating for. Only send out invitations to people who you want to be there.


Tropical beach wedding invitation suite

“The point of a wedding is to get money, invite as many people as you can”

Sorry Jan, but isn’t the point of a wedding because two people love each other and want to celebrate this with their family and friends? Don’t invite people just to receive money, because the amount of money you spend on them easily outweighs what they will give you.

“F what the groom wants, it’s YOUR day!”

No, my day is my birthday…and I get it every year, and its all about me. Your wedding is about BOTH of you! The worse thing is having your groom turn up to your wedding and looking just as surprised as the guests.


Worst wedding advice you have received

“Oh just DIY it!” Or “Jan’s son Dave has a really good camera, he can just be your wedding photographer”

DIY is hell for me. And it will be for you as well when you find yourself still awake at 3am the night before your wedding, gluing ribbon onto jars or cutting up a bazillion pieces of paper confetti. It's not worth the stress and time when you can pay someone to do it.

And only use Dave if you want your wedding photos to be of the sky, with blurry faces and the sun ruining them all. Photographers, and all (well, most) wedding vendors, are professionals who not only do what they do well, but they also are life savers in the event of something going wrong. More often than not, its during the hard times that vendors really shine, and show you why you’re paying them.

“This is the biggest day of your life!”

Not really advice but I had to include this one. My eye-roll is on point whenever I hear this. I really hope my wedding day isn’t the biggest day of my life, because seriously, do I have nothing else to look forward to after this? Have I not experienced anything as grand and wonderful previously before my wedding? 

I don’t know about you, but I am more than just one day in my entire life, I have bigger dreams and goals that I want to achieve than just to be wearing a white dress and walking down an aisle. Sorry Jan but no, I’m going to have PLENTY of big days in my life, and I am so freakin’ excited about all of them.

So the next time someone comes at you with one of these beauties, get those eye ball rollin' muscles working, and come back at them with so much sass, that they will be clutching their pearls. Or just tell Jan to piss off.

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